I’ve come to a fork in the road. As a wife, a parent, a friend, and a blogger. I have to decide whether staying true to myself is more important than potentially offending people or if I need to tone down my opinions and apparently “abrasive” personality to appease a few people who think that being around me is like bathing with a Brillo pad. My last blog post about my personal experiences on bed rest caused a stir with a handful of people. I received more positive support than negative support but the few people that it did upset felt it necessary to write me out of their lives because of my insensitivity to a certain woman, or perhaps all women, on bed rest.
I’ve been on bed rest before. I have my own set of limitations now. The blog was written by me about my own personal experiences, my old and new doctors, and old and new professional recommendations on bed rest. It was intended to educate a very large subset of women who are burdened by bed rest every day. It was intended to touch many women, not just one (narcissist) and her BFFs. I’m still confused how my plea for women to educate themselves and to be their own advocates where their health is concerned caused such a backlash. And after speaking to several people, both close to me and mere internet acquaintances, I’m still baffled that my post was considered “insensitive” and “abrasive”. It was very personal and written after several days of research. It was an educated post. And it was cathartic for me. It was a segway into a series that I am currently working on involving Postpartum Depression. Because more women need to know. And less women need to experience it. If I can save one woman from the clutches of bed rest-caused depression, I will feel like I have done my job.
When I found out that my bed rest with my last pregnancy was possibly in vain, I was TICKED. But not at the messenger! I was ticked at my old doctor. After living for the last 16 months with the aftermath of being bedridden for nearly 3 months during my last pregnancy, I want to tell as many women as I possibly can about the need to outweigh the risks vs benefits of this serious prescription.
I’m thankful for the outpouring of support that I HAVE received from women who have been on bed rest and women who believe that advocating for your own health needs to become a social norm. You may not have a medical degree, but nobody knows their own body better than you do. Listen to it.
I hope that this post continues to educate women and that less people choose to shoot the messenger and decide to question their doctor’s advice.
So there’s the fork.
Do I continue to passionately talk about the things that I know? My experiences? If I’m not causing a stir, am I being effective? Do I really even care that the “Gossiping Geese” have decided to write me off? Yeah, it stings but if my friends can’t accept the fact that I have freedom of speech and opinion, and that *GASP* they don’t have to agree with EVERYTHING I say, I don’t really want them in my life anyways.
I guess I have to come to terms with the fact that I may upset people while I’m on this journey. I might run across people who can’t have relationships with people who feel differently about things than they do. I need to be OK being ME and stop caring about what other people think. Oh geez, I sound like I’m talking to my shrink!
So there it is again, The Fork. Being that I am working on myself this year and that I am learning to love & live for me, I believe I’ll go THIS way: The path where abrasion is accepted. Because I’m never going to make everyone happy. And I’m going to learn to be OK with that and live with the repercussions no matter how much they sting.
Thank you for joining me, for listening, and for all of your opinions, whether they gel with mine or not.